CFC Library

CFC Library is dedicated to meeting the lifelong learning, reading and information needs of CFC Students, Pilots, Aviatiors, offering collections of aviation related articles and journals.

Pilot to Tower Conversations (Funny)

 

Approach Control: 747 Heavy, traffic is a 777 at your 2 o’clock at 4000 feet.

747 Heavy: Roger, Approach, we have that light twin in sight.

…………………………………

“TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees.”

“Centre, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?”

“Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?”

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SOME AVIATION HUMOUR FOR THE DAY

Pilots are people who drive airplanes for other people who can't fly.

Passengers are people who say they fly, but really just ride.
 
Fighter Pilots are steely eyed, weapons systems managers who kill bad people and break things. However, they can also be very charming and personable. The average fighter pilot, despite sometimes having a swaggering exterior, is very much capable of such feelings as love, affection, intimacy and caring. (However, these feelings don't involve anyone else.)
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Aeronautical Terms Redefined

 

AIRSPEED - Speed of an airplane.  (Deduct 25% when listening to a retired fighter pilot).
BANK - The folks who hold the lien on most pilots' cars.
CARBURETOR ICING - A phenomenon reported to the FAA by pilots immediately after they run out of gas.
CONE OF CONFUSION - An area about the size of New Jersey located near the final approach beacon at an airport.
CRAB - A VFR Instructor's attitude on an IFR day.

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Technical Problems Reported by Pilots and Remedial Maintenance Actions

Hi Everyone,
Got this sent to me a while back. Thought you'd might enjoy it after seeing the ATC and Pilot humor:

After every flight, pilots fill out a form called a gripe sheet, which conveys to the mechanics problems encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correction. The mechanics read and correct the problem, and then respond in writing on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken, and the pilot reviews the gripe sheets before the next flight.

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Always ask, never assume!!!

 


His request approved, the CNN News photographer quickly used a cell phone to call the local airport to charter a flight.

He was told a twin-engine plane would be waiting for him at the airport.
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